My boy cat has nipples…
current mood: tamagotchi after it poops
if I ever commit a murder I’m blaming this post
today this girl asked me if we were hiring and we are but i told her we weren’t because right now im the prettiest girl that works here and if she got hired i wouldn’t be anymore
my ex is still logged into twitter on my phone
i could be cliche and tweet ‘I’m a DOUCHEEE lol’
every few days i will tweet something he would totally say
but he will never remember tweeting it
slowly the slightly out of place tweets will drive him insane
you are satan
*James Franco voice* spring break forever.
real women have curves, running all the way from their gills to their tail fins. real women have sharp teeth. real women are sharks.
I stopped reading at “real women”
you should have kept reading
what if everything you see right now is just a hallucination caused by inhaling oxygen
Is that why when you stop breathing you black out.
GUYS STOP MAKING ME QUESTION MY EXISTENCE
im not surprised when tumblr people are failing classes cause you guys are dumb as fuck